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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: June 14th, 2023

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  • I like how the standard has fractured and there isn’t really a standard now, but I do also kind of like the obviously fake bodies being the standard because an insistence on natural beauty is more oppressive than the idea of beauty as something you do, an art or achievement, even a purchase.

    If beauty like that is something you choose, I am free to choose it or not. If it’s just by luck of birth, that sucks so bad. When I was a gawky tall stick insect of a teenager and the only girls considered pretty were the short and stacked, there was no way to meet that standard.

    Later the tide shifted but as I didn’t grow up feeling my body could ever be mainstream sexy, I didn’t get attached to that - I do have hangups but they are my own. I just try to stay in shape, have good hair, take care of my skin and let the rest be.

    But I think my unpopular opinion is beauty as something you do - makeup, style, fitness, is more democratic than insistence on symmetry of features or a particular height or build, the idea of “natural beauty” is worse. Beauty should be a choice, a hobby, a project, do or not.

    In terms of what I do not currently understand, it’s the moustaches. Young men with weedy little moustaches, straight men with moustaches that scream gay to me, the unopposed highway patrol/1980s gay man moustache I can’t wait for that trend to pass.








  • 3/4 of mine were born at home, but with midwife, 5 minutes from a hospital, and she won’t attend if you don’t agree to be transferred if necessary. Hospital birth when my kids were born really was over medicalized - the hospital by me had a C-section rate of over 50%, literally worse than a coin flip, they had you lay on your back, still, with monitors, it was designed to fail.

    I think now the hospitals have come around to some of the home birth ideas, if you are low risk you can walk around, give birth in a position that works for you, eat and drink for longer, better chance of natural uncomplicated birth that way.





  • I don’t think you are crazy for not wanting to drive, but don’t think it’s a good idea to quit because of the accident, either. Your dad is right, everyone does get on an accident eventually. I had a very bad one that totalled my car (someone ran a stop sign) and the trauma made me a bad driver for awhile, so watch out for that. But getting back behind the wheel, overcoming your fear and becoming a competent and comfortable driver is a life skill that will help you, even if you decide that you don’t want to have a car. The life skill of getting back in the saddle after a fall (metaphorically speaking) is an even more important life skill. But driving in particular really is helpful - I mostly bike now, but being able to drive well comes in handy at least weekly.