This August is only half through,

But for some, winter’s soon to ensue

So don’t Grinch on this carol,

’Cause we know in the Barrel:

Crackers love their Christmas Scooby-Doo!

Headed down to the pub for a beer

At the rainbows, recoiled in fear

”A parade just for pride

Of bright colours?” he cried.

”There are too many gay people here!”

Variden was once a great mod,

Until Reddit admins turned to fraud

So to Lemmy we’ll scoot,

Than be under Spez’ boot

And of his own hell he can be god